Recently a couple of friends and colleagues have dropped a line to say they're thinking of me - they know who they are and I thank them (again). I suppose there are others who simply don't know what to say. That is OK too, really. But when people ask me how I am I tell them this: some part of pretty much every day is excruciating, but that is better then when each and every day was excruciating all day. I cry and I rage and I talk to Jeff and, pretty often, I laugh at my memories of him. It depends on the day. I love him though. And that doesn't.
This picture was taken a month or so before Jeff died. The uniform was too big for him. But that didn't matter. Life sure was not big enough. I miss Jeff terribly much.